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Be Who you Are

Transformation Life Architects - Tuesday, March 27, 2018
I recently had a young woman come to me who wanted to change who she was. She was recently married and her husband was constantly telling her that she was childish and that she was not who he thought she should be. As well as this she was having temper tantrums.

When she told me this alarm bells rang. Her problem was that her relationship with her husband was a careful relationship. A careful relationship is where you allow the other person to impose their values on you. This means that you have to demean yourself.

When you demean yourself you will eventually get fed up and rebel. Hence her temper tantrums. 
All relationships should be even, when you impose your values on someone it is a careless relationship and when you allow someone to impose their values on you it is a careful relationship. 

These types of relationships lead to disharmony and conflict because as said before the person who has to demean themselves is fighting against it.

It is innate in us to be who we are. It is also one of the hardest things to be. When we try to be who we are not we will eventually rebel and disharmony occurs. The world is in balance and when we accept who we are then we are in balance.

So how do we find out who we are?

The answer is that to be who we are we need to know what our top five values are. Our lives and ourselves are demonstrated by our top values. The biggest problem is that we are not aware of what they are. Even though we spend our lives fulfilling our top values we don’t know what they are.

A value is something that we perceive is missing or is a void in our lives. The more it is missing or the greater the void the more important it is. We each have a unique set of values and when we live our lives in accordance with our top values we are who we are.

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