6 Signs of True Friendship
People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. It happens with our friends as well. Can you tell when an association is a true friendship and will stand the test of time? Maybe, is it a unique connection, an energy or is it being in a circumstance, a place, an event that makes a difference? I believe that friendship starts as a connection, a common link. But, it is also a trust, a bond, and something that You must build and work on.
Here are a few questions to ponder: Have your interest or values changed since you got older? There are so many ‘milestones’ in our lives that test friendships. Teenage friends may disappear if we choose different universities. Friends part ways when one or both get married. Perhaps you liked to travel, your best friend was really a homebody! Then, there is your career choice.
If you look back over your life to date, has anything happened that forced you to part ways with those you considered friends. Did you drift apart or simply got too busy? At the end of the day, you will always remember the friendships that have a real foundation.
Importance of True Friends
Growing up my friendships were extremely important to me, and still are. I grew up in Africa, specifically Rhodesia/Zimbabwe. My childhood life was all about friends. We lived an outdoor life filled with lots of kid’s activities, mostly pretending to be grand hunters and adventurers. When we turned 18 yrs old, this ‘fun’ became more serious with compulsory national service in midst of a war of independence. Due to our ages, talents, and interests, we were split up into different regiments, still friends, but no longer in close contact. I missed the close connections but made new friends as we all did.
In the army, I met 3 guys at Officers Training. We ‘clicked’ and within days were as close as brothers. Together we progressed through ‘Officers,’ then Medical training, eventually graduating as Army Medics. When it came time to ‘go into the field’ we said goodbye as we were assigned to different regiments. Little did I know that short time we were together was to cement a friendship that has survived decades.
Fast Forward 40 years!
I never forgot my Army medic mates – Richard, Nigel, Graham. I’ve never forgotten any of my childhood buddies: Pete, Bruce, Bill, Deb, and so many others… but we had all moved around the world. How to reconnect? Then there was Facebook! About 5 years ago, I started searching social media. I found my friends: In NZ, USA, South Africa! I found so many friends and caught up with so many stories of what they had achieved, lives lived, the ups and downs. Stories that brought joy, sadness and disappointment, but stories that connected us again over the miles and years. Eventually I found my Medic buddies.
Rhodesian Medics Reunite
In 2016, the 4 Rhodesian Medics and their wives had their first reunion in Capalaba Qld Australia. Arrived as strangers, but within minutes best mates again. A week full of laughs and fun we all had. In 2017, we met up in TeAroha in New Zealand and we joined by many other Rhodesian veterans from 1980. 2018 was NZ again. 2019 was stopped by a fractured leg, 2020 by Covid… but WhatsUp (now Telegraph) runs hot everyday between us all. We share each others success and challenges. We are there when one of us needs a pat on the back or a person to listen. It is a wonderful friendship I am blessed to enjoy. I am so grateful to FB for allowing us to re-connect. It is wonderful to have such buddies, and so happy I took the time to find them.
My 6 Indicators of True Friendship
Have a read through and identify which of these you believe represent true friendship:
Friendship withstands disagreements.
Anybody you consider a true friend can attest to the fact that disagreements undoubtedly happen. But that person can also confirm that your bond withstands those disagreements.
True friends know that regardless of the differences or disagreements, the foundation of the relationship still exists.
A sign of true friendship is when two people continue to communicate with each other after a disagreement.
Friends keep it real.
The beauty of friendship is that there is rarely any pretense. Friends share their vulnerabilities with each other. They trust that their quirks are accepted by each other.
Your true friends hardly worry about what you think of their actions or behaviors. They know that if there’s one person in the world who understands them, it’s you!
It’s also safe to say that your real friends avoid sugar-coating anything they’re saying to you. Expect to get their opinion as real as it comes!
Confidentiality is respected.
When the matter of confidentiality comes up, you can tell a friend by whether your request for confidentiality is respected. True friends acknowledge the importance of maintaining your trust.
With true friends in your life, you can feel comfortable sharing your deepest secrets. Your secrets will be just as safe with friends as they are when you keep them to yourself.
Your private space is important to you, and a genuine friend understands that. They understand when to step aside and give you the time you need. And they do this without feeling offended.
Support is unconditional.
It’s true that friends sometimes have different interests and beliefs. But even when viewpoints are different, true friends still offer support to each other.
Friends usually offer advice to each other. And even when the advice you get is different from what you want to hear, you know it’s coming from a genuine sentiment.
If you need someone to lean on when you’re going through a rough spot, your real friends instinctively know. They’ll show up when you least expect it and bring loads of hugs with them!
Achievements are celebrated.
It’s unlikely that you’ll find a true friend who doesn’t celebrate your achievements. The questionable friends may feel envious of your success. But true friends get just as excited as you do about your victories.
A true friend helps you prepare for ‘any and everything. Even if it’s a success they want for themselves, they’re happy knowing you stand a good chance of being the victor.
Sincere friends take the time to congratulate each other. They give gifts, treat each other to dinner, and make other special gestures. They like to show that they care.
Antidote to Anxiety
Having a close friend, someone you can confide in, talk to, and share life’s pain and joy with is ‘food for your soul!’ A true friend is that one person you know has your back, is there when you need them.
Have you identified anybody who embodies a true friend after looking at these indicators? If you have, latch on to that person as long as you can! A genuine friend can be difficult to find. There is great joy to be had when you nurture your friendships.
Commit to being the kind of friend to others as you want them to be to you. Friendship works both ways!
Friends Keep Me Grounded
I am blessed. I have 5 friends who I know, if I needed help, they would be there for me! Friendship is precious. Be Yourself. Be genuine and generous! It is more valuable than gold, and two hundred times as rare!