Steve Gardiner

Victim Anger or Protective Anger

Getting angry is normal. Anger is an Emotion. It is seem as detrimental, as something you don’t ever want to use. But the truth is, there is two kinds of anger. Victim anger is when a person has been bullied, or abused by a bigger, older or more influential person (the victims perception) and couldn’t or wouldn’t stand up for themself. The victim will scream: Thats not fair, please don’t do that to me! leave me alone etc. Protective anger is when you see someone being bullied and you step up and say: Leave him alone, get away, get back, You will have me to answer to! Its an empowering anger. We have all been there – probably in both situations. In one scenario: the person is powerless, angry and out of control. Anger is an afterthought. The ‘I should, could, would of’ wishes that haunts until resolved. In the second, the person uses protective anger – a good strong anger to take control, to push back and protect. There is true power and goodness in protective anger. This is the anger we all need in our emotional tool kit.

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Do You Really Want to Change?

Do you want to change? This is the first question to ask when you ‘think’ you should/need/have to change some habit that is not supporting you. How many times have you decided to quit smoking, start a diet, or go to the gym but never got past the first step? For most of us – the answer is dozens of times! Please don’t beat yourself up; it’s not because you are silly or a failure. It is simply due to three things. 1. You like doing what you think you need or should change! You are trying to appease someone or something. 2. You have Unconscious Core Beliefs blocking your success, or 3. Past emotional events (unconscious trauma – big or small) are blocking your success. Unconscious, you feel ‘it is unsafe for you to change. A little coaching is all you need to want to change your life!

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Do You Really want to change

You Don’t Need to Be Fixed

Today life moves at a fast pace. Electronics have sped up how we do business, meet friends, and have holidays. Everything can be and is done in an instant. But this has a huge downside. We can, and most of us do, lose track of reality. Let go of what is important while we chase after the next sale, and set up the next appointment. We race here and everywhere and forget to leave time to live. Life is a balance. It is impossible to keep going frantically no matter who you are. The secret to happiness is balance. Balancing the have to do, the need to do’s, with the I want to do! Burn Out can happen very quickly when we are not centred and we are chasing an illusive goal without really knowing why. Balance comes from not only chasing a goal, but enjoying the journey and knowing when you have achieved it.

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I am a work in progress

Can You Imagine Life After You Stop Smoking?

Life after you stop smoking can be awesome. Your body starts to repair itself the moment you finish you last cigarette. The sooner you stop, the quicker you start to increase your energy, lower you blood pressure, reduce the toxic deterioation of your cells, lungs, heart and Bank account. Smoking is expensive. Very expensive – around $13000 of your hard earned dollars goes up in smoke every year. Add that to the physical and mental health issues that go along with smoking – You have nothing to lose, everything to gain. Life after you stop smoking can only get better.

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I do not smoke

Fear or Phobia

TRTP – The Richards Trauma Therapy was created in 2013 by Judith Richards as a result of her recovery from extreme mental, and physical domestic violence. TRTP is unique, simple yet life-changing. It deals with the cause, not your symptoms, of your emotional past. Your symptoms may be: excessive drinking, eating, gambling; depression, stress, pro-longed anxiety; you may suffer from addictions or inability to sleep. There are many symptoms – but generally one cause: unresolved emotional events that have happened in your past! TRTP resolves them – generally in 3 sessions! Investigate More……

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I am NOT safe

Discovering Your Life’s Purpose

The lifelong question: Who am I? and Why am I here? What am I supposed to achieve? How will I know if I am going in the right direction? These questions are asked by almost every human being. WE all want to know, that we made a difference. That our life was not wasted, or in vain! What is the bigger picture for me? There has to be a reason, doesn’t there?

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Affirmations

Empty Nest Syndrome

How do you start to put ‘You’ first after 20 years of putting the kids first? We all long for the day the kids leave home and then they do! What to do now? We have time, more money, and can’t think of what to do. Sounds familiar? Then you are suffering from empty nest syndrome. For Mums it can be very stressful: suddenly you are feeling you have passed your Use By Date! You spend 16 hrs a day ‘doing’ for your kids and then they don’t need or want your help. Now its time for you, but you have forgotten what you want to do. My e-book might give you some ideas.

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Breathing Strategies to Manage Anxiety

Our breathing is a reflection of what is happening inside emotionally. It is impossible to breathe slowly while maintaining anger! It is impossible to breathe rapidly whilst meditating or trying to relax. Only one emotion can be dominant at any one time. So, if you are anxious or having a panic attack, your breath will be shot, rapid gasps… slow it down! Deep breathes, long exhales. Just 2 or 3 will quickly change your state, slow your breathing and allow you to become calmer, more balanced. Just focusing on your breathing. Try it for yourself.

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Breathing strategies to help anxiety

Are You Spending Christmas Alone?

Christmas and holiday times can be the loneliness times for people. It is a fact that suicide rates increase. Think about spending time by yourself on Christmas Day? No family, no friends – just you and your thoughts! Very scary for most of us, but some people it is their life’s reality. Do your bit, take the time to make someone feel special! Let them know you care! It’s all well and good saving the planet, but we need to have people to enjoy it. Everyone, no exceptions deserves to be made feel special, to know someone cares about them at Christmas. That is the essence of Christmas! Let’s make a difference this year!

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